Return to Speedwork

Today, Yasso 800's returned to my life.

1 mile warm up on indoor track.

800 on treadmill in 4:30.

1/2 mile recovery on indoor track.

800 on treadmill in 4:20.

1/2 mile recovery on indoor track.

800 on treadmill in 4:10.

1/2 mile recovery on indoor track.

800 on treadmill in 3:59.

1/2 mile recovery on indoor track.

5 miles. Hurt so good. And so bad. Wowza. Getting back in "shape" (if you could call what I was before "in shape") blows. A lot.

I admit it: I kinda hate being so much slower than I was before. I've never, ever been FAST and I never will be. I'm OK with that. I'm not Boston material. That's OK. But, I could hold a upper 8:something pace decently easy before I got pregnant. Now... a 9:00 mile is like a SPRINT. I was PANTING embarrassingly loud during those 800's. Like, REALLY, REALLY loud. If I was running next to someone breathing as heavy as I was I would have been worried about them. I hated being passed on the track by people (even if I was running slow on purpose for recovery). I felt judged by people. In my head, they're thinking "Oh my goodness! What is that girl doing? Why bother running if you're running that slow. I mean. It's not even running. It's hardly even jogging. And, LISTEN to how out of breath she is! Is she even OK? Should we call someone?" Of course, I KNOW (somewhere in my head) this is crazy talk and no one even notices me, just like I don't notice anyone else's workout. Still. I hate that a workout that used to be FUN and, while hard, not OMG-I'M-DYING hard.

But.

But, I didn't give up. I didn't stop. I pushed. HARD. I pushed out of my comfort zone. I pushed harder than I thought I could go.

And for that, I'm proud and enjoying a nice runner's high.

And, M&M's.

I'm enjoying a runner's high and M&M's. That's about right.